Congo: Violence, Heartbreak, Beauty & Possibility

Time keeps on passing by, but sadly there is not much to report on our adoption. There was a rumor floating around the adoption community that the exit permit suspension would end in February. We let ourselves get a little hopeful over this for a couple weeks, because really, what else are we going to do. If somebody dangles a piece of hopeful information in front of us, we are going to jump on it. Unfortunately, the embassy met with DGM (the issuer of exit permits) and found out this rumor is false and the suspension continues as usual (which is to say until September, or whenever else they feel like issuing them again).

As we keep going through the daily motions, life in Congo continues as usual also. A few weeks ago a rebel group (made up of "youths") launched an attack on several places in Kinshasa, including the airport we will be flying into. The attack was shut down pretty quickly- 46 of the child soldiers were killed and another 20 were arrested. This event is unsettling on so many levels. It is scary that the rebel violence made an appearance in Kinshasa, the largest city in DRC and located in the usually calmer western part of the country. It is also very sad that the children rebels were killed. I understand the attack needed to be stopped, but these children probably never had any opportunity to do anything different with their lives. If given a real choice, I doubt many of those young people would have chosen to join up with a violent rebel group and go on a useless suicide mission in Kinshasa. It is just such a waste of life.

A couple of days ago there was a lightening strike in the city that our son Roland was born. The lightening struck a munitions building on a military barracks, which created an explosion. More than 20 people died and around 50 people were injured. Exploding shells hit homes as far as 4 miles away. Considering the DRC receives the highest frequency of lightening strikes in the world, they seemed oddly unprepared for the occurrence. It is sad that one bolt of lightening created so much havoc on Roland's city of birth.

While Congo is full of violence and sad stories, it is also a land of unappreciated beauty. Apparently it is even possible to ski in Congo. You just have to take a risky in- country flight, go on a motorcycle ride, drive down a cow path and take an arduous mountain climb first. I really wish that when we travel we could see more than just the congested streets of Kinshasa. I would love to experience the beautiful landscapes and diversity of life that my son's birth country offers. If only it was a little bit safer and more accessible, it would make a great eco- adventure travel destination. For now I will have to be satisfied by the short videos made by some adventuresome travelers. Watch and you will be pleasantly surprised that a video about Congo can focus on more than just poverty and violence.

http://vimeo.com/82312797

Click on the link above for a 15 minute video on the "Congo Ski Club".

The Benefits of Not Being First

I did not think I would get to a point where I would be writing this post, but there is quite a bit of craziness going on. I have done plenty of whining about not being included in the last US Embassy investigation, but a part of me is becoming relieved. Things are not going well for that group of families from my agency, who are among the first who went through the new investigation procedures. Paperwork is lost, the children's passports are not ready on time, and their appointments are being pushed back. There are vast miscommunications between our agency and the embassy and other Congolese officials. Adoptive families are losing money because they have to change or cancel their plane tickets. They are also having a hard time finding a place to stay in Congo. Kinshasa is a large city, but there are few hotels that are affordable and safe. To limit the choices more, some hotels do not allow adoptive families to stay there. Some families have had their bags packed for weeks and are still not allowed to travel. When they do get to go to Congo, they do not know when they will be allowed to leave to come home again.

 The stress that these families are going through is horrible. Unfortunately there is never a point in the adoption process that once we reach it, it is just easy sailing from there on. We have to fight for our children until the moment we bring them through our front door. I must say I am a little relieved to not be in the "guinea pig" group and hopefully everybody will learn from all this craziness. I hope the US Embassy learns how to make the process smoother and quicker. I also hope our agency will hire more reliable and hard working people on the Congo side of things. The one guy they have now is extremely overwhelmed at this point. Of course I am willing to go through all these hardships and stress to get to my son. However, since being in this first group is not an option, I can sit back and try to learn what I can and be as prepared as possible and hope things are better by the time it is my turn. (And all the while I am praying that my two worst fears will not happen: that our son will not die while we wait and that the Congo adoption program does not close).

Treasures of Congo: Okapi

I realize that I frequently write negative sounding posts about the DRC. It is too easy for my mind to turn Congo into a one- dimensional land of despair. However, Congo is very large and diverse and Roland deserves to know there is more to his birth country beyond violence and poverty. In an effort to learn more about other aspects of Congo, I am starting a series called "Treasures of Congo" where once a month or so I will highlight something that I find good, unique, or interesting within the DRC.

I will always think the most fascinating thing about Africa is its wildlife so I will start this series off with the Okapi. The Democratic Republic of Congo has the most biodiversity of all of the African nations and it is the only home to the Okapi. This unique looking mammal looks more like a zebra relative, but it is most closely related to the giraffe. Of course the okapi's neck is much shorter than a giraffe's, but they share similarly long legs and long, flexible tongues. The okapi's tongue is so long that it can clean its own eyelids and the inside of its ears. Okapis have oily, velvety coats that help repel water in the moist forests that they live in. Okapis eat many plants that are poisonous to humans and they have been known to consume charcoal off of trees that have been struck by lightening. Although the okapi was unknown to the western world until the 20th century, an ancient carving of an okapi was found in Egypt. For years, Europeans referred to this mysterious animal as the "African Unicorn". In 1992, the Okapi Wildlife Reserve was formed to protect the habitat of not only the 5,000 Okapi that live there, but also for many other species. The reserve is one of the most important bird conservation sites in mainland Africa. Some of the major threats to the wildlife of the area are deforestation, poaching, mining, violence, political instability and inadequate funding. I truly hope that someday the DRC becomes peaceful enough to start an eco-tourism industry. It really has so much to offer and I would love to go back to visit in the future and be able to appreciate Congo's diverse landscapes and wildlife.

Watch the whole video to see just how long their tongues are!

Independence Days

On June 30, Congo celebrated their Independence Day. Congo was under Belgian rule from 1908 to 1960. Independence is usually a good thing, but sadly, Congo's story of independence did not turn out as successful as America's. Belgium's main priority of governing Congo was to extract it's abundant natural resources and they did treat the local population as second- class citizens. However, they also brought with them better health care and education than Congo had ever experienced before. The Belgians took an interest in the endemic diseases and launched large campaigns that just about eliminated them. Belgian Congo was also one of the few African colonies that actually taught local native languages in the schools. They also put an end to the brutal practices used by mining companies to try to get the most production out of their workers. I am not trying to idealize the colonization of Congo; you just can't wrap up Congo's history in a neat little bow. The native Congolese did not have a say in the government and they were treated with a separate set of rules, but the Belgians did bring with them helpful advances in infrastructure, medicine, education and possibly order. After Congo won it's independence, there was no fairy tale ending. They did not have the opportunity to flourish under wise, benevolent leadership. They only suffered under one corrupt leader after another and the resulting relentless conflict and poverty. Their infrastructure is crumbling and the government is too weak and/ or corrupt to adequately deal with the violent rebel groups and to create a country of order and safety for their citizens. The people of Congo do celebrate their Independence Day, but I believe it is more for an excuse to have a celebration than it is a day of exclaiming "Look how great our country turned out since we are free of Belgian rule!". As we celebrate our own Independence Day in a couple of days, let us be truly grateful for the wisdom of our founding fathers who created our nation. Our country definitely has its issues, but, compared to many, it is still overwhelmingly a place of freedom, safety, and opportunity.

Preparations

Speculations from our agency seem to shift with the wind. Our latest news from them is that we do not have much of a chance of bringing our son home this summer. They gave us an opportunity to make an extra trip to Congo to file some paperwork, without any guarantee that it would make any difference in our timeframe. We decided not to take the potentially worthless extra "quick trip" to Congo. Right now we really have no idea when we will travel to Congo to bring our son home. One thing I have learned from this adoption is that making mental timelines is a complete waste of time. Just about every month or two the process of adopting from Congo changes so who knows what things will be like a few months from now.

We went into full- on preparation mode when we thought we might travel this summer. We are continuing on with the preparations, just less frantically now. The next time we hear there is a chance of picking up our baby, we will not be caught unprepared.

We urged our family to start buying us things off of our baby registry (by the way, thank you so much for all the gifts- we truly appreciate them!). It's been fun receiving all these boxes from amazon and opening them up to see what presents we got that day. We attempted to set up some of the nursery furniture, but only accomplished the changing table. While we were putting the crib together, a piece of the wood cracked so we decided to send the whole thing back. We are now trying to pick out a crib substantial enough to at least withstand us assembling it.

 

Large boxes waiting in our kitchen to be dragged upstairs

The end of our empty nursery- YAY!

The boxes made it upstairs

Copper checking everything out
 

We also had a visit with our family doctor. He prescribed us anti- malaria pills and we were able to talk at length with him about travelling overseas and baby care. We also made a general game plan for when we bring our son home. For some reason our doctor could not give us our vaccinations so we had to make an appointment with the state's health department. We received shots for Yellow Fever and Hepatitis A and pills for Typhoid. The nurse didn't tell us which arm got which shot, but one of the vaccinations has left my arm very sore- so sore that it's hard to move it, I can't sleep on that side, I can't let anything bump into it, and sometimes the pain spreads to my neck and back. I guess that's the price I have to pay to travel to beautiful Congo (ha ha). The typhoid pills are very finicky little things. They have to be kept refrigerated and we take them once a day, every other day for a week. We have to take them one hour before eating and at least two hours after eating so I"m still trying to figure out when I'm going to fit these into my day (I'm a grazer).

I am grateful for the vaccinations, but it is also unsettling to think us Americans have to load our bodies up with shots and pills just to "survive" a two week trip to a place millions of people call home. Sometimes I catch myself thinking "Oh my goodness, I"m going to Congo. I'm going to be so uncomfortable!".  But the truth of the matter is we will be staying at a hotel with running hot water and air conditioning and we will be drinking clean bottled water and the best quality food available. If we have a medical problem, we will call up our private driver and we will be treated at the hospital. If we have safety issues, the embassy will look after us. Our stay there will be nothing like the lives of the people who live in Congo day in and day out in shacks or on the street, without access to clean water, food and medical care. For some reason it is unacceptable for white/ American travellers to run into problems overseas, but it is alright for the people living there to live and die in pitiful conditions. It seems as if there is a higher value placed on our lives than theirs. As I said before, I am grateful for our safety precautions as I do like to be comfortable, but the discrepancy between our standard of living while staying in Congo and the living conditions of millions of the Congolese will make me uncomfortable.  And that is the end of my human rights rant for now.

It is a Long and Bumpy Road

The long, winding road to adoption is full of bumps and dips and mud and quicksand and boulders and downed trees and....and....

It's not too bad travelling down this road when you know you will eventually arrive at your destination. Although, some of these obstacles make you doubt if you will ever successfully make it to the end.

The first big scare I had was last November. While everybody in the U.S. was busy preparing their Thanksgiving meals, a rebel group in Congo completely took over a city in the eastern part of the country. The Congolese military had retreated and it seemed as if the Congolese government had no control over the eastern half of it's nation. I was really nervous that adoptions would be suspended during all this turmoil. That incident actually did not affect adoptions because the cities that people adopt from are usually in the western, more stable part of the DRC. But, it is still hard to have faith in an adoption program from a country that is barely holding itself together.

In the beginning of this year we received some more bad news. The US Embassy changed their orphan investigation timelines from two months to up to six months. A few years ago there were only 50 adoptions from the DRC; this year it is expected to have 500 adoptions. The US Embassy has not hired any new employees to keep up with the piling workload. For the investigation, they need to travel to the child's birthplace to interview family members. The worst part is that they are only doing investigations for children from Kinshasa. They do not have the resources to travel to other parts of the country to conduct investigations. The US Embassy currently does not have a plan as to how they will conduct the required investigations in the city where my son is from. Without the Embassy investigation, my son will not be able to immigrate to the United States. Until they hire new people and get a real plan in place, it is easy to believe that the investigations for children from outside Kinshasa will take longer than the six month estimate.

Last week we received even more bad news. The Congolese government has  "temporarily suspended issuance of exit permits to adopted Congolese children seeking to depart the country with their adoptive parents". This basically means they have suspended adoptions since you can't bring your child home without the exit permit. This suspension is in response to a Canadian adoption that was not complying to their rules. While they investigate that adoption and others, nobody else can bring their children home. The exit permit is the very last step of the process, so it is not affecting our adoption yet. Our agency does not seem overly concerned and I am hoping that it will all get worked out before we get to that step. The word "temporary" makes me nervous. It could mean two weeks or a year or it could be a stepping stone to "permanent".

When we first started this adoption, adopting from the DRC was supposed to be a relatively easy, one year process. It seems to me that Congo is on it's way to eventually shutting adoptions down. This goes along with the general trend of most countries. When a country's international adoption program becomes popular, they become uneasy about other countries taking all their orphans. They shut down adoption programs and blame it on "unethical adoptions". (Child trafficking and other unethical adoptions are serious issues, but completely shutting down adoptions permanently is not the answer).  It really seems that throughout the world, many countries are closing their doors to international adoption, even if their own domestic adoption is not improving. I don't know if it is a pride thing or an anti- America thing, but I know so many children are going to miss out on being a part of a loving family because of it. I will not be surprised if the DRC eventually shuts down its adoption program. I just really hope we can bring our baby home before they do.

Introduction to Congo

Before I get started, I want to give you a quick update. We received a bit of good news: we don't have to re- do our physical exams. Yay! That will save us some time and money. We now have all the documents we need to complete our dossier. Every document is notarized and scanned into our computer. (It would be a very bad time for a house fire.) Everything has been e-mailed to our dossier coordinator for a final reviw before we send it out to be state certified.

 

I would like to share some information with you about the Democratic Republic of Congo. I know I didn't even know where it was on a map before we started looking into adopting from there. The DRC is the second largest country in Africa (by area) and has 71 million people, making it the 19th most populous country in the world. It has a tropical climate and the highest frequency of thunderstorms on the planet.  From 1908-1960, Congo was ruled by the Belgian government, making French one of its official languages. Congo has abundant natural resources (cobalt ore, copper, diamonds, gold, silver, zinc, etc.) but, sadly, little of that benefits the people living there.

The Second Congo War (1998- 2003) devastated the country. It is the world's deadliest conflict since WWII, killing 5.4 million people. Rebel armies continue to spread violence across the country. It is estimated that 1,500 people die per day because of the conflicts. The rebel armies forcibly take children to turn them into soldiers and sex slaves.

Congo is considered the worst place in the world to be a woman. It is known as the "rape capital of the world". The prevalence and intensity of sexual violence in Congo is unmatched anywhere else.

This country suffers from widespread malnutrition, disease and poverty:

- In 2012, the DRC was rated as the poorest country in the world.
-Only 46% of the population has access to clean water and 75% of the population are severely undernourished.
-The life expectancy is only 48 years.
-Over 1 million people are infected with HIV.
-Malaria kills 400 children a day.
-One in seven children die before reaching the age of five.
-THERE ARE OVER 5 MILLION ORPHANS IN THE DRC.

I know there are people who have issues with international adoption. They feel that adoptive parents are stealing children from their birth country and heritage. I realize the importance of culture and racial identity, but more important is the child's right to LIVE. To live a life with access to food, water, medical care and education. To a life with the love and support of a family. To a life with a future.